bjenkins's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[NG Series War]

Very nice

for that little time with flash, this was amazing.
senseless violence movies can get annoying, but this was pretty cool. btw, you can just get hax off the internet to make your trial never expire. They aren't too hard to find. Just use google. I mean, not that i'd do it, im just saying you could. (. ) (. )<->( .) ( .)

[Home Movies 2]

Old People Humor

It's a proven fact that as soon as you grow up and have children, you are no longer funny to anyone except for other adults with children. Too bad this is newgrounds. I'm sure I'll love this in 15 years.

Caikclock responds:

*Reads your profile, age 29?

6 years tell your my dad's age. This was mainly for Reletives we just decided to unleash it on newgrounds for the hell of it. It's suppose to have a cuteness factor to it we would of made it more morbid but we have reletives. Anyways thanks for your review.

[My First Stickwar]

Just Spectacular

who says you can't make a great fighting movie where neither of the characters move for the first two minutes? Not me, or the rest of the world.

[Elric, The Magical Elf]

Hey, that old guy was Jepetto

Jepetto, or however you spell his name, is a trademark of Disney, and Disney is heartless. If they see this, they will tear you to shreads. *It makes no difference who you are, Disney will find you, and they are unmerciful. Prepare yourself.

*"It makes no difference who you are" is a registered trademark of Disney. All use of it must site it as such.

[Alley of the Dolls: Pt. 3]

OMFG!!!! I am the Mortician Magician.

I knew from the title, "Alley of the dolls" that this would be funny, but I didn't realize it would be so fucking hilarious. I'm still crying I'm laughing so hard. The Mortician Magiician was my favorite, but I also liked the voices. Also, The blank stares on everyone's faces really adds. You can go pick me up some fresh ones... At the morgue that is!!!

[my project]

Woah, fell asleep. What happened.

I missed quite a bit of that, but what i could keep my head up to look at seemed a lot like crap. Take away the shape tweening with 4 solid blocks of color, and all you have is an amature poem. Amazing. Maybe if I didn't understand how easy it is to shape tween, or how bad of a poem that was, I might give you a good review. If you could respond with how many pages that poem was, that would be great. I think it was on the verge of a book.

[Paper Wars]

Amazingly bad

Hmmm. Maybe I'm missing some part of the joke, but that seemed ridiculously lame. I thought the graphics were unnaturally good, and the idea of doodle fighting is interesting, but crap is crap, whatever it looks like. You can sculpt crap into wonderfully detailed sculptures, but it's crap at its core all the same. At any rate, at least it's refreshing to see something that isn't gratuitously violent in the top spot at newgrounds.

[-=Stick Wars Episode II=-]

Very good

This movie truly deserves to be in the top 50. It is nice to see something successful on newgrounds that has a beginning, middle, and end, as opposed to just a long string of random fighting. The only weird thing about this movie that I noticed is that it started out making fun of almost every bit of the movie as it came along, and slowly skipped more and more, until the end just rushed by. I assume this is because the movie would have taken so long that you would have gotten bored and given up if it stayed as comprehensive as it started.

[Drowning]

I like it, but...

DONT READ THIS REVIEW UNTIL AFTER THE MOVIE, IT WOULD BE A SPOILER.
This movie is very cool, but the part about when the guy was a baby and he almost drowned should have been put before the part about him training himself to the water. Also, it seems like the part animation from when he is a baby is a bit rushed and out of place(specifically the guy pointing). If there had been a little more plot to it, and the stuff i just mentioned was there i would have given it a ten, but you have your own artistic license and your way probably works best. Overall a great work and probably the best movie here in its category. Keep up the good work.

[Old Glory's Revenge III]

What's with these reviews?

I don't understand why people are using your movie to debate slavery and shit like that. I'm going to take a wild guess that since your movie came shortly after september 11, it was a part of the angry movies about killing Binladen that quickly filled newgrounds. I don't see what being mad about terrorism has to do with native americans, but people like to throw around their opinions. I liked the sounds in this, but there wasn't enough animation and length to the movie to give it over a 5. that's pretty damn funny that those stupid fucks managed to catch themselves on fire. lol